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By Carol Gaithuma
I woke up this morning to Facebook pictures of a young man who boasted on his timeline how he slept with a class four child. The comments below the screenshot photos were those of the general public baying for his blood. The whole of this scenario is very messy from all the perspectives and I will not ignore my own feelings of disappointment, distaste, anger (to be honest it is rage) towards this man. I am a woman who was once in class 4, a mother to two sons who will one day be that guys age and above all, an empathetic human.

My humanness is what has inspired this article because I believe if we strip ourselves off of all the drama that our earthly roles bring, we relate as humans. I have calmed down enough to admit to myself that I do not have enough information about the involved parties to make a judgment. The only thing I have is the societal conditioning of what is good and what is bad and my spiritual of do no harm. What that man did was bad by all standards. Now as I move past that, I come across the ‘why’. Now that’s difficult.

In my long short experience as a transformation life coach, I have gathered enough proof through my own experiences to confirm that anything that I see/experience outside of myself is a reflection of something within me. So you can imagine my shock when I saw this. I asked myself, really? You want to tell me that there is something about me in that murky fiasco? Well, let’s see.  

Here is a man who is confessing to sexual addiction on his timeline and flaunting his crazy ideas about sex, sexuality, relationships and even money. I believe he represents the part of me and of society that has weird crooked beliefs about sex, sexuality, relationships and money that are no longer serving us but hurting us. Then there is a standard 4 girl who seems to consensually engage in the act with him. I believe she represents a part of me and of society that is young, innocent and not aware of the danger that lurks behind the camouflaged crooked disempowering beliefs.

Maybe he, she, I , you, we are attracted to these beliefs (as perpetrators or victims) because we do not feel unconditionally loved and accepted by those who brought us into this world and that’s why we have been conditioned to seek out approval from everywhere apart from within ourselves. There is only one kind of magic in the world, and that magic is undivided love and attention from those who mean the world to us. If we don’t get it at home, we head out unconsciously to seek it ‘out there’.

The degree to which you desire it and the depth of your connection to your values is what determines what actions you take and where you go to get this love and attention. We might all want the guy to be killed, castrated and arrested but let us take a moment and listen to that which is within us that is being reflected by this guy and child. That is the part of you that needs your attention.

What do you believe about sex, sexuality, relationships and money? Which of these beliefs cause you to see others as less deserving, lesser than you, as a means to an end? Which ones make you feel like you need to do something to be more loved, to belong, and to get attention? These beliefs are the ones that brought this story to you. They want you heal from whatever caused you to believe them and replace them with empowering beliefs so that you can be a better person.

Choices have consequences and so it is important for these two involved to be brought to a place where they can see where they went wrong. However, unfortunately, many of the observers of this drama will be swallowed by the emotions that the story stirs up in them and they will see it as having nothing to do with them. They have forgotten that we are one.

If you change your inner landscape, society around you changes and we will no longer come across such incidents. You can only make this world a better place by becoming a better person. Everything we experience every second of everyday is a God-given opportunity to be better. To be a better image of He who is your true essence, your creator.

Love & Light
Our Guest writer is an Intuitive transformational life coach based in Thika and Nairobi.

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