COULD SINGLE-PARENTHOOD BE THE ROOT CAUSE OF THE PROBLEMS WE ARE FACING TODAY?
Over half of all children born every year spend all or some
of their childhood apart from one of their parents, more so their fathers. In
fact, there has been a drastic increase in the number of single-parent families
in the latter half of the twentieth century. Since the 90s, teenage
pregnancies, which comprise two-thirds of teen mothers, have risen. Part of the
reason include lack of close contact with adult role models, peer pressure;
family poverty, the perception among many teens that few opportunities for
success are available, and inadequate sex education, especially about
contraception and family planning. Girls who have a positive self-image, high
expectations and aspirations for the future, and good relationships with their
parents are much less likely to get pregnant than others.
The other form of parenthood involves single women who choose
to bear or adopt and raise children alone. Technological developments allowing
insemination without actual inter-course have contributed to women's choices in
this regard as in the case of lesbians. Mother-only families also include
widows, divorced and separated women, and never-married mothers.
With one parent, the challenges of parenthood get
multiplied. This is because of the responsibility overload where only one
parent makes all the decisions and provides for all of the family needs. There is
also the task over-load, where the demands for work, housework, and parenting start
becoming overwhelming for one person. There is also the emotional overload. The
single parent must always be available to meet both their own and their
children's emotional needs. All these result in problems for the single parent,
not to mention the loneliness, anxiety, and depression.
Many psychologists argue that this has been the reason why
we currently witness so many negative effects in children, families, and
society. It is argued that children raised by single parents are more likely to
fare worse in school, their social and emotional development, their health and
their success in the labour market. In most cases, they are usually at greater
risk of parental abuse and neglect, more likely to become teen parents and less
likely to graduate from high school or college. Furthermore, teenagers who
spend part of their childhood away from their biological father are twice as
likely to become parents themselves before age twenty, and one and a half times
as likely to be idle in their late teens and early twenties.
The other disadvantage faced by children in single-parent families
is inadequate attention and guidance from the parent. Children need more than
just economic security to thrive; they require parents who have the time to
help them with their homework, read to them, and listen to how their day went
in school. They also need parents who can supervise their activities outside of
school. One parent alone does not have the time to do these things, whereas two
parents working together often do. This as a result of instability in the family
structure.
In mother-only families, children tend to experience
short-and long-term economic and psychological disadvantages, higher absentee
rates at school, lower levels of education, and higher dropout rates (with boys
more negatively affected than girls) and more delinquent activity, including
alcohol and drug addiction. Adolescents, on the other hand, are more negatively
affected by parental discord prior to divorce than by living in single-parent
families and actually gain in responsibility as a result of altered family
routines.
A common explanation for the problems found among the
children of single parents has been the absence of a male adult in the family. The
relationship between children and absent fathers is usually difficult and
strained and has implications beyond childhood. It is a fact that single
mothers are socially ostracized and seen as having inferior status. This works
negatively in the physical and psychological growth of their children. Societal
views are also expressed in public discourse about women living outside of
marriage and family who fail to live up to the ideals of motherhood imposed
through legal and public policies. This is the main reason why fatherless
children are at a dramatically greater risk of drug and alcohol abuse, mental
illness, suicide, poor educational performance, teen pregnancy, and
criminality.
It is also a fact that 49% of all child abuse cases are
committed by single mothers. Fatherless children are also at dramatically
greater risk of suicide since they are more likely to suffer from psychological
disorders, compared to those living in intact families. It has also been identified
that boys who grow up in father-absent homes have trouble establishing
appropriate sex roles and gender identity.
Growing up in a female-headed household has remained a
statistical predictor of behavioral problems in children especially in teens
and adolescents. Children reared by a divorced or never-married mother have
been found to be less cooperative compared to their peers in two-parent homes. They
usually get into trouble more than those from two-parent families. They oftenly
show high levels of emotional distress or problem behavior. Father ‘hunger’
often afflicts boys between ages one and two especially those whose fathers are
suddenly and permanently absent. They have trouble falling asleep, get
nightmares and night terrors frequently especially within one to three months
after the father leaves home. As they grow older, there develops greater levels
of aggression especially in boys.
The relationship between family structure and crime is so strong.
There has been this theory that children without fathers or living with
stepfathers were less likely to have friends who think it's important to behave
properly in school. They also exhibit more problems with behaviour and in
achieving goals. The absence of a father also increases the risk of harshness
from the mother which increases the risk for them developing a criminal behaviour
later in life. A study that was done in America showed that 72% of adolescent
murderers grew up without fathers, while 60% of America's rapists grew up the
same way.
Anyway, not all children raised in single parent families
suffer these adverse outcomes; it is simply that the risks are greater for
them. It is sometimes true that children of single parents do better than
children of married parents, especially 10- to 14-year olds. In their
day-to-day lives, single parents are friendlier to their children than married
parents. Their children also tend to spend more time with people in their
extended families than did the children of married parents.
Sociologists found out that single mothers rarely raised
their children single-handedly. They instead have networks of friends and
relatives and neighbours who care about them and their children, and have been
part of their lives for years.
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